Photo: spo0nman

A poetry contest on a health blog?

Well, yeah, we did one before, and readers came through! It was a challenging topic (low-cal snacks) and a "modest" prize (a coupon for low-cal snacks), and yet there were some awesome entries!

So we have another one today, with a better prize, inspired by today's post on the main Cranky Fitness page about the claim that vigorous exercise might make you gain weight.

(Anyone buying that? Anyone?)

Well, whatever you think of that notion, I suspect many of you will keep right on exercising. Either you don't believe the folks at Time Magazine, or you have other reasons for wanting to stay active.

Wanna write a little poem, haiku, or a limerick about why you exercise? Or hell, sing a song, draw a cartoon, pen a novel, produce a 3-act play, film a movie, or write and stage an Opera about it? Whatever!

I'm feeling tired of the boring old Random Number Generator and would rather just pick the "best" creative comment on this theme to win our prize for the week. I may ask the assistance of couple of Anonymous Impartial Judges to help me.

However, be warned that judging will be entirely subjective and probably unfair. Be prepared to write the best entry, and then lose out to one that is obviously not nearly as good! That's how these things generally work.


What's the prize?


Glad you asked! Have you heard of these gizmos? It's a SanDisk slotRadio player.

I will quote from the SanDisk website because I haven't gotten to try one yet:

"Introducing slotRadio™ – the instant load music player bundled with a 1,000 song slotRadio™ Mix card. No downloads, no PCs and no work involved. Simply pop the card in the player and enjoy a near-endless supply of full-length tracks. It’s great music, made effortless."

The player retails for $99.99, and the features include:
· FM tuner;
· Integrated belt clip for hands-free listening;
· 1.3 oz and the size of a matchbook;
· Additional genre-specific cards available for purchase;
· Up to 13 hours of battery life between charges.

How to Enter the Cranky Fitness Poetry Contest:

Write a poem or do something else creative to answer the question: why do you bother exercising? If you can leave it in the comments, please do, if it's something especially weird and unwieldy creative, you can email whatever the hell it is to CrabbyMcslacker @ gmail dot com.

Deadline: Tuesday, August 18th.

Winner announced the next day, Wednesday Aug 19th. Check back by Saturday to claim your prize.


Do You Have to Have a U.S. Address to receive the prize?

Sorry, yes. However, if you enter and are not from the U.S., you can still have the glory of winning, and then you can designate a U.S. friend or favorite blogger or secret crush to receive the prize. They will be very grateful, and you will be revealed to be not only talented, but generous too!

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I'm always happy to disclose when I get a product sent to me for free to review, because I'm hoping it makes me look cool and popular because telling readers I've received goods in exchange for providing a review is the honest and ethical thing to do! So, um, yeah, I didn't pay for this fancy-pants TRX Home Training bundle. The package comes with the "TRX Suspension Trainer Professional," plus a dvd, door anchor, tote bag, and some instructional information.

And what the heck is a TRX Suspension Trainer? Well, it's basically a couple of adjustable straps that you anchor to something solid like a beam or a tree, or (if you get the doorway anchor accessory) to the top of a door in your house.

Like so:

You can tell this is not me because of:
(a) the rugrat and (b) all the smiling.

You use this pair of straps to position yourself in a bunch of different ways, so that gravity and your body weight work together to provide resistance when you exercise. By changing the angle you're at, you can make it easy, hard, or totally freakin' impossible.

And it's not just for sissies like Crabby either. Apparently, even tough-ass military types use the TRX.


The TRX folks have figured out exercises designed to target your whole body. They've got presses and squats and dips and crunches and all kinds of stuff. The website has video demonstrations, and they've got lots of suggestions for creative ways to use the contraption to work your upper body, lower body, and your core. Or, if you're so inclined, to make porn videos.

This woman is probably very nice and we swear she is
not even THINKING of making a porn movie.

So I tried it, and what did I think about it? Well, in short, I mostly liked it!

What's Awesome About the TRX:

1. It's really well made. The materials are tough and heavy duty; there's nothing flimsy about it. Yet it's designed to be easily adjustable. It really is no hassle to lengthen or shorten the straps.

2. It's light-weight and portable. If you have a small apartment or do much traveling, the fact that you can get most of the functions of a home gym in a tiny little tote bag is pretty darn appealing.

3. You can do a LOT of different exercises with it. I just tried the first 12 they suggested, but it looked like online there were a lot more.

4. It's adjustable so you can make things harder or easier. And changing the angle you use is much easier than moving a bunch of weight plates around.

5. It recruits many muscles at the same time so you get more "functional" fitness. Because you are using your body weight to supply resistance, often the exercises involve you supporting that body weight with both your core and the specific muscles being targeted. Your core and all kinds of obscure supporting muscles get a workout, not just one isolated set of muscles.


What's Less Awesome About the TRX:

1. A lot of these exercises you could do without the fancy strap. Some of these are familiar floor exercises that have been modified by adding suspension. For many of these moves, you could probably achieve the same thing with a doorframe to hang onto or a stability ball to lean against or whatever.

2. It's an Expensive Fancy Strap. The bundle that includes the door anchor is $169; the basic model in $149. I know "Expensive" depends on your income and frame of reference, so perhaps this doesn't seem expensive to you. If you're financially comfortable and are comparing the TRX system to other home gym alternatives, the price tag is not gonna seem too bad. However, if you're a cheapskate like me or a handy Do It Yourself sort of person, it's going to seem bizarre to pay so much money for a pair of adjustable straps with handles. But then a lot of people will pay more than this for a trendy blouse or a purse, neither of which can give you a full body workout unless your fashion choices are mighty eccentric.

3. Gravity isn't always going in the right direction. On some of the exercises, like the abductors, it seemed like the resistance was not coming from quite the right direction to work the muscles it was supposed to. But what do I know? I'm not an exercise physiologist.

4. The TRX uses functional whole body movements at the expense of isolating individual muscles. While most people think of this as a great thing, I found that I couldn't seem to muster up nearly the same feeling of resistance in the muscles I was targeting when I used the TRX as when I use free weights or a universal-type weight machine. I felt like core muscles and other supporting muscles were the ones getting fatigued and supplying that feeling of "let's stop now, shall we?" But I wonder if once I got used to the movements, my core might strengthen and allow me to work the individual muscles more aggressively? Anyway, if you're used to using machines or free weights that isolate individual muscles, the TRX type resistance might not feel as "satisfying," if that makes any sense.

5. And (surprise!) some of the exercises aren't nearly as easy as they look in the demonstrations. Also, some aren't as challenging as you'd think either. But this may be a "newby" issue; it may just be a function of selecting the right level of difficulty and mastering the form.

Overall: The small size and convenience of this system makes it a great choice for home exercisers, especially for those who don't have a gym membership or a lot of space or money for a full-on home gym. It's great for functional fitness types, because you get a lot of core work, and you can pick up the speed and do the strengthening exercises for cardio too. And it's a particularly handy choice for folks who travel because of how portable it is.

However, if your have access to a real gym, and particularly if you like traditional strength training routines with heavy weights, you might find this more useful as an "on the road" alternative rather than a main source of exercise.

Caution: this product may improve your physique to the point where random strangers try to grab your ass.


Oh, and if you'd like to read a really thorough and enthusiastic review of this product, check out the review posts at The Great Fitness Experiment. (And there's another one here too).

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Photo credit: mikebaird

You know how they say you should dance like nobody's watching? The only time I can manage that level of carefree rug-cutting is when nobody in fact is watching. Like when I have the drapes drawn so the neighbors won't see me trying to learn how to dance.

The nice part about dancing along with a DVD is that the people on the television do not snigger at how you dance. Not once. And when I dance, there is much to laugh at. Sadly, my name will never be mentioned in the same sentence as dancers like Fred Astaire, Crabby McSlacker, or Dmitri Chaplin.

These DVDs give you the chance to try something fun and get a workout while you're doing it.

The Cardio Funk DVD features:
- Hip Hop - Lauren
- Contemporary - Travis
- Disco - Courtney (No, a glittery disco ball is not included. Sorry.)
- Cardio Funk Bonus Workout



The Tone and Groove DVD has:
- Hip Hop - Twitch
- Jazz - Katee
- Cha Cha - Dmitry
- Tone and Groove Bonus Workout

I included the names of the dancers/instructors because, if you've been watching the show you recognize the names and if you've been hiding under a rock you need to know what people have been so excited about.

I've been in the Under-the-rock category, so it was educational to try these DVDs out. Obviously your heart rate is not going to be as high if you're stopping to figure out the steps, but once you get going, these DVDs can provide a workout!

Would you like to try these exercise DVDs?
If you'd like to be entered for the giveaway, please leave a comment. Do you like to get out there and dance all night long, or are you looking for a new fun way to get fit?

Finicky fine print stuff:
- 3 Winners, picked by Mr. Random Number Generator on Thursday, August 6th at 11:59 pm Manhattan Time
- USian mailing address
- Winners announced Friday, August 7th.
- If you win, as I really hope you do, 'cause I kinda like you, then we need your name and address by Wednesday, August 12th.

This Contest Is Now Closed. Sorry.

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No, this is not a picture of me. I am not that tan, that slim, or that hairless. However, on the plus side, I am also not sliced down the middle, and unlike this lady I actually have a head.

So I've complained many times over the years about how running hurts my knees. I've tried different stretches, various strengthening exercises, orthotics, ibuprofin, taking breaks, cross training, avoiding pavement--it all helps, but nothing completely resolves the issue.

And sure, I'll quit running for a while (for a time I even tried to embrace dorkwalking racewalking). But I always come back to running, because unlike many forms of exercise, I actually like it!

One weapon in the battle against the pain in my crappy crunchy knees that I discovered in the last year or so (at the suggestion of the always helpful Dr. J), was icing my knees after a run. It really does seem to help pain and inflammation, and has allowed me to continue to abuse my knees week after week, which may not sound like a great thing but trust me, it is!

Here is a picture of my first Reusable Ice Pack:



But it started to leak and stink after a while.

So then I graduated to a big lumpy gel cold pack thingy I bought from a running store. I forget the brand name, but it cost about $25. You store it in the freezer, and strap in on with velcro straps. But it wasn't specifically designed for knees, so it wouldn't fit snugly and would fall off if I tried to walk in it.

So when the Moji folks told me that they had a Cold-Wrap designed for knees that would fit comfortably rather than lumpily and wondered if I wanted one of my own? I said you betcha!

And sure enough, this is gonna be a short review because the Moji really is great and there's not a lot of "cons" to talk about, just "pro's." It's a comfortable way to ice your knees with minimal hassle.

The whole thing stores relatively flat in your freezer in it's own little ziplock bag. When it's time to ice, you strap it on for 20 minutes (do watch the time or you could get frostbite), and unlike actual ice, it's not painfully cold. It uses compression as well as cold temperatures, so getting the size right is important. (It comes in lots of sizes). The thing is comfortable enough to walk around in, and if you're willing to spring for the "to go" thermos, you can take it with you you're exercising away from home and keep it cold for hours. (I didn't get to try this part, but i think it would be a really nice feature).

There's only one con to the whole system: the price. The thing retails for almost $85, and the "to go" accessory is another $55.

Is it worth it? Well, it seems like it is to me, but then I got mine free. Before, when I just had the lumpy bumpy icepack, I would frequently "forget" to ice because it seemed like a hassle. Now I use the Moji much more often.


Would you like to win a Moji Cold Knee Wrap?

Just leave a comment! The Random Number Generator will pick a winner on Wednesday, Aug 5th.

If you win, you'll need to email us your name, address, and your size information by Saturday, Aug 8th.

And I believe they are opening this giveaway to anyone! (Apparently there are some ordering issues online for those buying internationally that they expect to resolve soon, but that won't affect the giveaway).

So does anyone else have knee issues when they work out?

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So Do We Really Need Another Health and Fitness Magazine?

Of course we do! Or at least I do. I have to confess I'm addicted to them, despite my many complaints about them. You'd think spending so much time on the web visiting health blogs, news sites, journals, etc, the last thing I'd want is a glossy magazine full of healthy eating and exercise tips. But as it turns out, yes I do! Because when the Fitness Magazine folks offered me a free subscription I jumped all over it. Jump, jump, jump! And they were generous enough to offer a giveaway subscription and prize pack too.


So What Do I Think?

Well, unfortunately, my copy hasn't arrived yet, and I'm too cheap too darn busy at the moment to purchase an issue off the newsstand. So this isn't intended to be a review. But I did get a peek at the July issue, and it's got some cool stuff in there. Don't let the cover throw you off though, because as is the case with almost all magazines marketed to women, it's annoying as hell.

The cover makes many promises to make you "slim," "hot," "pretty," and "skinny," but there is the frustratingly little cover ink devoted to "getting healthy," "building strength," "avoiding heart attacks" or "kicking ass." However, I suspect this is because most women standing in line at the grocery store will not buy magazines about kicking ass, just about looking pretty. I have ranted about this many times before and so will just shut up about it now.

Anyway, that said, the magazine itself seems way more health and fitness-focused than the cover. In fact, the article billed as "50 Best Foods That Will Keep You Skinny" on the cover turns out to actually be titled the Fitness Healthy Foods Awards, highlighting the best tasting and healthiest convenience foods they could find. And many of my favorites were on the list!

So I sense there may be some tension between the Skinny Pretty Cover Agenda and the Fit and Healthy Editorial Agenda. And I personally think the best way to resolve it would be to have a kickboxing match between the marketing folks and the editorial folks. And if the editorial people should happen to thrash the marketing people? Then they should be able to put an actual real life Size 12 model on the cover and talk about nothing but actual health and fitness! In which case sales would no doubt plummet and all the Fitness Magazine people would unfortunately be out of jobs, but it would great while it lasted and at least it would be fun to watch them duke it out, don't you think?

Go Editorial!
Photo: livegym-showtime

How to Win a Subscription and a Prize Pack:

So sadly, I think this is another US only deal. To be honest, I forgot to ask but I noticed it said U.S. only at MizFit's site. And what are the chances they're going to say: oh, but for you, Crabby McSlacker, we'll ship anywhere! So Canadians and others non-Americans, comment at your own risk. We'll totally appreciate your contribution, but you probably won't win a magazine subscription. Winner will be chosen via Random Number generator; only first comment counts if you comment more than once.

So the Prize Pack includes a magazine subscription, cosmetic bag, umbrella, apron, hat, notebook, and massager. (Note: not that kind of massager, sorry).

To enter, just leave a comment below saying what you like or don't like about health and fitness magazines.

Entry deadline: Tuesday night, July 28th.
Winner announced: Wednesday, July 29th.
Check back to claim your prize by end of day Saturday, Aug 1.

Thanks for stopping by!

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Welcome, you found us!

As I mentioned in the intro back at Cranky Fitness, Mark Sissons of Mark's Daily Apple has come out with a book called The Primal Blueprint. He believes we should all be eating and exercising the way humans did 10,000 years ago.

In fact, the role model/poster-boy over at his blog is a fellow named "Grok," who lived back in Paleolithic times. "What would Grok do?" is a frequent subject of discussion over at Mark's Daily Apple.

Hi there, Grok!

So this looks like a very interesting read, and there are many, many aspects of primal living that seem quite sensible. We at Cranky Fitness totally endorse cutting way down on processed crap, eating more whole natural foods, and getting lots of exercise.

However, longtime readers of both blogs might have noticed that Crabby McSlacker and Grok have slightly different approaches to healthy living. (In fact, back in the early days of Cranky Fitness, Crabby wrote a guest post over Mark's place defending the consumption of Splenda and cupcakes!)

So how to handle the fact that Grok followers are a bit more hard core than Crabby, and that we don't see eye to eye on everything? Well, I could embark on a scholarly debate about evolutionary biology, and question the notion that we should try to emulate the paleolithic lifestyle in so many of its particulars. But that might involve a lot of work! make for a dull post.

Instead, I'll just point out a few random similarities and differences between Crabby and Grok and let you readers weigh with your own thoughts about Primal Living. You folks (a) know a lot more about the specifics of what's involved and (b) always have the best observations and arguments anyway!

Sample Differences Between Crabby and Grok's Approach to Healthy Living:

1. Grok didn't eat grains or sugar. So Grok's followers think you should limit them--and not just junky white flour and other refined grains, but whole grains too.

Crabby says screw that. She has a hard enough time staying the heck away from Krispy Kremes. Do not mess with her whole wheat bread, brown rice, and oat bran muffins.

2. Grok ate a fair amount of animal fat--and many of Grok's followers love their lard. They believe it is good for us and has been unfairly demonized.

Crabby is more scared animal fat. Though she could happily gorge on cheeseburgers and barbecued pork ribs on a daily basis, she believes that red meats and animal fats are best kept to a minimum.

3. Grok didn't eat burritos and his followers say you should go easy on legumes as they are not all that great for you.

Crabby says WTF? She feels quite virtuous when she eats things like beans and split peas and lentils! She is working on eating more of these, not less.

4. Grok did not use an elliptical machine, go jogging, or take Zumba classes, and his followers think we should skip the 3-5 sessions a week of traditional aerobic exercise we are so often told to do. Instead, you should "move frequently at a slow pace, lift heavy things, and run really fast once in a while."

Crabby agrees that those three things are all good, but Crabby likes to get high on endorphins. She loves to run, and bouncing around on an elliptical machine to good music gives her a rush she just can't get by torturing herself with intervals. She is not convinced yet that she'd be better off chucking her cardio workouts.

5. Grok must have eaten lots of protein, because his followers advocate eating greater amounts protein than many of us typically get.

Crabby also believes protein is important (and many women don't get enough), but she is hesitant to "beef up" (sorry) her protein intake as much as Grok's followers would recommend. She worries about medical complications like kidney disease that one can get from high protein/low carb diets.

But enough with the pesky differences. There are also many ways in which Crabby is totally willing to consider Grok a role model!

1. Grok didn't sit on his ass in a desk chair all day long and Crabby doesn't think this is a great idea either.

2. Grok never went to Friendly's, McDonald's, or TGI Fridays, and Crabby would just as soon stay the hell away from them too.

3. Grok didn't run marathons and Crabby ain't gonna either!

4. Grok didn't have a twitter account or a facebook page...and neither does Crabby!

5. Flying across the country in a metal tube 40,000 feet in the air would have scared the crap out of Grok, and Crabby does her best to avoid this too!

6. Grok wouldn't have known what the heck to make of shows like "The Real Housewives of Orange County" and neither does Crabby!

Proving that Crabby is actually very primal!


How To Win a Copy of The Primal Blueprint:

You don't have to be a U.S. resident to win!

Just leave a comment about anything to do with the whole caveman/primal/paleolithic approach to health and fitness, pro or con or confused. I'll chose a winner by Random Number Generator by Tuesday night, June 23rd . Winner announced Wednesday, June 24th. And if you win, please email us at Crabby McSlacker @ gmail dot com to claim your prize by Saturday the 27th!

UPDATE: The Winner has been selected! Go to the Cranky Fitness winner announcement post and find out if you won!

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Ever wondered how you could be such an "adult" in so many other areas of your life, yet respond like Pavlov's poor drooling dog when cued by the sight of crispy french fries or creamy frosting, or the smell of a bacon cheeseburger sizzling on the grill?

We know this stuff is terrible for us... yet some of us find it so difficult to resist.

Why the heck is that?

Well, according to Dr. David Kessler (who served as the FDA commissioner in two administrations), part of the reason we overeat is because our brains have been hijacked! In the book "The End of Overeating: Taking Control of the Insatiable American Appetite," Kessler exposes some fascinating tricks the food industry has for making their products incredibly, unnaturally enticing.

He also explains why our brain chemistry makes us so vulnerable to the cheap thrills provided by sugar, fat, and salt. (So for those of you hopping over from the intro back at Cranky Fitness wondering what the heck "orosensory self-stimulation" is, this it where it comes in: it's "the cyclical process in which eating delicious food tells the brain to make us want more of those foods." And similarly, the "hedonic hotspot" is not a nightclub but a tiny part of the brain about the size of a head of a pin that "causes us to really like something.")

The book also describes a problem that so many in our society seem to struggle with: that of "Conditioned Hypereating." Kessler proposes a treatment theory that involves "food rehab," featuring sensible concepts like like "planned eating." He also advises people on how to make the "critical perceptual shift" necessary to regain control of our diet and our health. (And Crabby promises to stop quoting practically every word the poor man has written "any minute now.")

So this is the part of the review where Conscientious Co-Blogger Merry Sunshine would provide the thoughtful analysis. Whereas I'm going to present instead a gratuitous photo of an Italian Men's Soccer Team in order to distract the heterosexual female portion of our demographic. (But this time, instead of their white undies, the boys are wearing black!):



Did that work? Are you distracted enough that I can get by with a really quick take on the book?

It's actually a fascinating read, and has a lot of great details about how our brains and current food manufacturing technology conspire against us to defeat our best intentions. No wonder we're so tempted to eat such unhealthy stuff! It's one thing to think abstractly "My those Cinnabon rolls sure are tasty" and another to read how carefully they were designed to make us helpless to resist. So the book is really useful in providing perspective on how tough it is to avoid unhealthy food, and to appreciate the power of the forces that lead to "conditioned hypereating."

This would be an especially great book for a friend or relative who does not frequent health blogs and is only just beginning to appreciate how totally f*cked up our society is when it comes to "normal" eating habits.

But for many of us who have long been aware of the Ubiquitous Evil we are up against at our restaurants, grocery stores, and shopping mall food courts... it's a bit like preaching to the choir. And while we all grapple with temptation, many of us have developed our own common sense strategies for indulging only occasionally, in moderation. Kessler's "rehab" techniques, while certainly sensible, are not all that novel or detailed. Because while stating the problem is helpful, it's the "solution" part that's tough to implement.

That said, he does make at least a good start on it, and while many of us may feel we know this stuff, we can always use reminders. Plus, there is obviously a huge segment of the population (no pun intended) that does not frequent health blogs. Many folks are in the dark about how pathological their eating behavior has become, how unhealthy that is, how it's not just a matter of "willpower," and what some good techniques are to regain control over what we eat.

So, want to win a copy?

Leave a comment by Thursday. Unfortunately, this giveaway is limited to folks who can receive mail at a U.S. address. The random number generator will pick a winner Thursday June 18th, which will be announced by Friday, June 19th. Please check in by Wednesday June 24th to claim your prize or we'll have another drawing. (NOTE: I'm going to be out of town for a few days which is why the entry period is longer than we normally do.)

Special Update: More chances to win! Sagan over at Living Healthy in the Real World and Rupal over at 101 Exercises are also doing a giveaways of this book, and they explain it all much better than I did!

Any thoughts on the obesity epidemic, the role of sugary, fatty, salty, processed foods, the menus as restaurant chains, the methods you use to eat healthy in spite of being surrounded by junky temptations, or the Italian men's soccer team? Comments of all sorts welcome!

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