CF Reviews

Excruciatingly Honest Opinions About Health and Fitness Products.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

Skinny Bitch Body Exercise DVD (Review)

It will take me 7 words to review this DVD.

The workout:



The music:

My overall opinion?

You want more words? Okay, here goes


Look, I'm sorry, but this is like the first Skinny Bitches exercise DVD that I reviewed: I can't find anything positive to say about either. I thought, from the cover, that there would be some weight lifting. I thought my muscles would get something out of this. All I got was a piano ear-worm. Skip it.

The DVD follows the usual routine: abs, legs, arms, and butt -- which the Skinny Bitches refer to as 'ass' during the workout because they're hip and cool. Or something like that.

By the time I finished sitting through the introductions (yes, plural), I'd lost any motivation that I ever had. The excessive patter turned me off before I'd even started.

A tip for people who make exercise DVDs: if the customer has already popped your DVD into their machine, that's not the time to give them a lecture on how exercise can help them -- they've already bought that proposition. And the DVD.

The warm up was so lightweight that I didn't feel like the core muscles got warmed at all.

The workout felt like a warm up.

And the music! Endless repetitions of piano muzak like being trapped in the elevator loop from hell. I kept thinking I was in a mall. Maybe that was the intention, to make people think shopping and Sex and the City trendiness. Because that's just so related to exercise. Or something like that.

My favorite part? A 5-minute meditation section at the end. Yes, for 5 whole minutes neither of these women says a damn thing! Not even the word 'ass'! I wouldn't have thought that was possible.

Okay, it was a little weird the way the camera stayed focused on them sitting there with their eyes closed for 5 minutes, but what the hell. Also, I wondered where the faint breeze came from -- this was filmed in what looked like an exercise studio -- but at least it looked artistic as it gently tossed their hair.

As with the Skinny Bitches Boot Camp DVD, there's a major disconnect between what the cover promises and what you get. Notice how the DVD cover at the top of this post shows a woman holding a dumbbell? I faithfully got out my weights when I started this thing, but I shouldn't have bothered. At no point in the DVD do they use weights. Presumably the picture of a woman lifting weights is supposed to be representative of fitness in general. It's symbolic. Or something like that. Bah humbug.

Want to feel hip and cool and get a workout at the same time? Rent a Sex and the City DVD and watch it while jogging on the treadmill. In high heels. You'll get more of a workout.

If you've got an alternative opinion of the Skinny Bitches, or their exercise DVDs, or if you have your own personal least favorite DVD, please leave a comment. You get bonus points if you can condense the comment to seven words :)

(Obligatory legalese: bonus points not redeemable for any cash value product. We're all about the verbal rewards here. Offer void where prohibited by law.)

Leopard:
Scream: Cat:

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  • Cranky Fitness rocks the "Skinny Bitch" review! :)

  • THANK YOU.
    Ive not seen the DVD but wanna stab my own eyes out when friends sing the praises of the bootcamp book or othercookbook'yone

    cant get beyond the stupid title,

    Miz.

  • It is so refreshing to read an honest review about a crappy product.

    I've been lucky so far to never have a truly abysmal product experience--so sorry you got stuck with the lame one!

    The cover alone would scare me. That is not a cartoon I would want to look like!

  • I don't think I was in danger of accidentally buying this, but thanks for the warning, anyway!

    said dragonmamma/naomi on September 3, 2009 at 4:38 AM
  • One of my sorority sisters suggested I read the book, saying I'd love it. I was deep into my ED then (had already broken 2 bones in my foot, but hadn't started involuntarily vomiting everything I ate). Beyond the fail of telling an anorexic to read a diet book (and one that restricts a lot of food), I hate hate hate the title.

  • OMG, I love the pics you used fro your 7 words!!!! I am a gym rat so don't do DVD's BUT if I did, this would not be it. I would be a P90X type of gal!!!!!

    Thx for the warning. I will tell my DVD workout friends!

  • After reviewing the DVDs, I don't think I could face the books.

  • Hahaha! Best. Review. EVAH. This was my fave part: "A tip for people who make exercise DVDs: if the customer has already popped your DVD into their machine, that's not the time to give them a lecture on how exercise can help them -- they've already bought that proposition." SO TRUE.

  • GOD! I love you.

  • Thanks, Merry! I can't tell you how much I appreciate an honest review, esp when the product is crap?

    And amen sister about pointless introductions. Unless you are showing me some complicated moves we're going to use or telling me what equipment I need, I don't need to hear how this is going to revolutionize my life, thank you.

  • Love the photo review. Excellent job!

  • My GOD I hate the pointless introductions!

  • I wish every review were so honest and fun to read at the same time.

    Thanks for the head's up on this one.

  • I should've mentioned in the post the fact that Fit Bottomed Girls did a much nicer review of the same DVDs:
    http://fitbottomedgirls.blogspot.com/2009/02/skinny-bitch-workouts.html

  • I love the blunt honesty...you saved me from another dissapointing DVD workout. Thanks :)

  • Yikes. I wouldn't have bought that DVD to begin with. I don't really enjoy people who refer to THEMSELVES as skinny bitches. ;)

  • 'Blunt honesty'? I think the word 'bitchy' could be applied to my review.
    Though you'd think with a name like 'Skinny Bitches' they'd prefer an honest if unfavorable review rather than something politely insincere.

  • This is a DVD I personally would have never bothered even checking out so I am glad you did the reconnaissance work. Someone has to do it!
    It seems like pretty much everything I would expect. To tell the truth I feel like the Scream character whenever I have to listen to the horribly, bad "dance" music" or muzak on most exercises DVD's. AAGGHH!

  • Those skinnybitches are just trying to make money off their skinnyness. Poor deformed things.

  • Now this is one product you should give away...as in give the dumb dvd away to the Goodwill, lol!

  • hahaha! Love it, Merry.

    (The review, not the product. ;)

  • Skinny bitches who say 'ass' while working out are neither hip or cool.

    Great review.

  • GREAT review!!!!!
    I really think these two women may just be THE most annoying people in the world! I also think their 15 minutes may, thankfully, be almost up.

  • Thanks for the warning. These ladies sound too tragically hip to be serious about a workout. I'll skip it.

  • Oh, this review cracked me up! Thanks, Merry! (That's the beauty of blogging...even crummy products/experiences have great blog-fodder potential!)

    And Cranky? I agree about the cover cartoon. She looks like a victim of a Photoshop disaster. (Warning: Aforelinked site is funny, and great for pondering the image manipulation that goes on in advertising, but not necessarily safe for work. Some images made me laugh myself to tears.)

    And I also hate too much chatter in workout videos, especially at the beginning. (Even on 30-Day Shred, I wish that the Level 1 commentary had been as down-to-business as the Level 2 & 3 commentary.)

  • Skinny bitches because we should all strive to be rabid anorexics?

    Good laughs. :)

  • Thanks for the review. Saves me wasting my time checking it out myself.

  • (posted this in the wrong place first time...)

    I think you'd be hard-pressed to not hate something presented, unabashedly, by "skinny bitches". The only thing worse than being put through a work-out by skinny bitches is being put through a LAME workout by skinny bitches. It's like having Paris Hilton as your math tutor.

  • I love this review..mainly because of the pictures and the cat with the gun, haha. Anyway, I do have some favorite dvds that I figured I'd share. You can check some of them out here:
    http://www.askmelissa.com/index.php/features/hot_body_hottest_trends

  • OH NO I just started reading the book, and I also bought the body dvd. Hopefully it's not as tragic as you've made it sound. Although, your readers seem to agree...

    Rebecca
    You Should Sponsor Me
    LIVING.ON.THE.DAILY.

  • What a terrible terrible video. I completely wasted my money buying it and my time doing it. The racist slurs sent me over the edge...I will never do this workout AGAIN!

    said Anonymous on February 21, 2011 at 11:56 AM

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